Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Predator versus prey: Accelleratii incredibus and Eatius birdius

It's the classic scenario between predator versus prey. The never ending struggle for survival which has fueled natural selection between species for eons. It is a noble battle, it is a necessary battle, and it is a lethal battle.

The predator (Eatius birdius) is on the hunt in his quest for survival. He catches the scent of a potential meal. Instantly a cold blanket of calm cloaks the predator, and all of his senses become enhanced, his mind more alert. He slips behind a nearby outcropping, and drops closer to the ground so as not to be spotted by his prey (Accelleratii incredibus). Inside the mind and body of the predator a deadly transformation has begun. His already alert mind becomes more focused on the prey blocking everything else out. His digestive juices, and no small amount of adrenalin, begin pumping, and salivary glands become active. As his bloodlust becomes more intense, a line of drool escapes the confines of the predator's glistening fangs, and runs slowly down its fur and lands on the dirt of the desert floor. He's waiting for the just the right moment to make his attack.

That moment comes prematurely, as a sudden shift in the wind carries the predator's scent to his prey, alerting the prey to the predator's presence. The prey becomes wary, and slowly scans the area for available escape routes. As he scans, he notices a subtle, almost imperceptible motion near a rock to his right. The predator realizes that he has been spotted and there is an preternatural silence for an eternal moment. Then the chase begins! The prey flees relying on its natural defense - its sheer speed - to deliver it to safety. But the predator is prepared, and being naturally cunning makes an adjustment in his strategy.

Suddenly, incomprehensibly, the predator stops and pulls out a box labelled "ACME Rocket Skates". He slips on the skates, and lights a match putting the flaming tip to the wicks of the rockets. The rockets, of course, explode, turning the noble predator into a coyote shaped cinder. The prey returns to gloat over its escape. It stands before the immobile cinder and says "Beep-Beep!" The cinder collapses into a pile of ash with two eyeballs on top.

The eyes blink twice.

The prey disappears over the horizon leading a trail of dust.

Commonly known as Accelleratii incredibus (left) and Eatius birdius (right), other varieties include Fastius tastyus and Apetitius giganticus.

Thanks to Jerry Harris for this one.
See more Warner Brothers skeletals (and one set of Disney characters) here.
Text from here (I wish I had that good of an imagination!)

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